How to Stop Post-Breakup Anxiety from Ruining Your Life

You know , the one that moved in right after your breakup and refuses to leave. If you're waking up in cold sweats, obsessively stalking their socials, and feeling like you’re going through actual withdrawal, congratulations (or condolences)… you’ve met post-breakup anxiety.

Breakups don’t just break hearts, they hijack your brain chemistry. That’s why even if you know it was the right decision, your body acts like you’ve been dropped into a survival situation with no map.

Today, we’re going to unpack why breakup anxiety happens, what those breakup withdrawal symptoms look like, and most importantly: How you can reclaim your peace before it wrecks your life.

Let’s get one thing straight: breakup anxiety isn’t just in your head. It’s rooted deep in your brain chemistry and science backs it up.

When you go through a breakup, your brain responds in a way that’s eerily similar to withdrawal from an addictive substance. A study published in the Journal of Neurophysiology found that romantic rejection activates the same brain regions associated with physical pain and addiction cravings. Translation? Your brain literally panics without its usual source of emotional comfort, which used to be them. 

That’s why your chest feels tight, your stomach’s in knots, and you can’t stop obsessing over what went wrong. It’s not just emotional heartache: it’s neurological.

And if you needed another reason to cut yourself some slack, a study in the Journal of Family Psychology found that 43.4% of people experience a significant decline in well-being after a breakup, including heightened anxiety, depression, and decreased life satisfaction. (Source)

So yeah: The spiral you’re in? It’s a perfectly normal (though painfully inconvenient) part of the breakup detox process.

If you’re experiencing any of these, it’s not just you:

• Obsessive thoughts about your ex

• Stomach knots and nausea

• Chest tightness and shortness of breath

• Trouble sleeping (or sleeping too much)

• Social media stalking binges

• Crying out of nowhere

• Panic attacks when you see their name or old photos

These are classic signs of post-breakup anxiety. And no, you're not crazy : you're human.

The hardest part about anxiety after a breakup is that your brain loves to chew on what-ifs. You rehash old fights, fantasize about getting back together, and torture yourself with imaginary scenarios. Here’s how to interrupt the spiral:

1. Set a No Contact Rule (Yes, Block Them)

The quickest way to calm anxiety is to cut the trigger. Remove them from your digital life. Mute, block, delete, whatever you need. Out of sight = one less reason to spiral.

2. Distract Your Brain with Dopamine Hits

Replace the high you got from them with healthy dopamine boosts:

• Watch comedy clips

• Take a hot girl walk with a savage playlist

• Eat your favorite dessert (no guilt allowed)

• Pick up a hobby you abandoned during the relationship

Check out 13 things to do instead of texting your ex blog post here for more inspiration.

3. Keep Your Hands Busy

Anxiety lives in idle hands. Paint, bake, rearrange your room, start a new show — anything to keep yourself occupied.

4. Use a Breakup Journal (Like Over His Sht)*

Journaling isn’t just for angsty teens. Writing down your obsessive thoughts helps your brain process and release them. My Over His Sht* Breakup Journal was literally made for moments like this — with sassy, tough-love prompts that’ll help you untangle your feels and remember who the hell you are.

Let’s be real: there’s no magic pill to instantly cure heartbreak. Time is the only cure. But these tools help:

☕ 5-4-3-2-1 Grounding Technique
When anxiety hits, name:

• 5 things you can see

• 4 things you can touch

• 3 things you can hear

• 2 things you can smell

• 1 thing you can taste

It yanks you out of your spiral and back into the present moment.

☕ Breakup Playlist Therapy
Make a playlist of songs that validate your feels and remind you you're a bad bitch. Bonus: dance breaks count as cardio.

☕ Limit Breakup Content Binging
Watching 10 hours of TikTok breakup videos feels comforting until it’s not. Set a timer or limit yourself to one hour of pity party content a day.

☕ Move Your Body
Anxiety gets trapped in your body. Sweat it out, even if it’s just a walk around the block. Physical movement literally burns off stress hormones.

If your post-breakup anxiety is:

• Causing daily panic attacks

• Making you avoid work, school, or social events

• Leading to destructive habits (like drinking too much or stalking your ex’s new boo)

It’s okay to reach out for professional help. Breakup grief is real, and therapy or coaching can give you coping tools you might not have learned growing up.

I know it feels like your world is ending. But one day,  sooner than you think,  you’ll wake up and realize you haven’t thought about them in days. The ache in your stomach will fade. The urge to check their page will evaporate. And the version of you that comes out on the other side?

She’s going to be fierce.

Until then, take it one ugly cry, one playlist, and one journal prompt at a time.

You’ve got this. And when you forget? Come back here and let me remind you.

P.S. If you’re ready to start healing like the savage queen you are, grab my Over His Sht* Breakup Journal. 50 sassy, no-BS prompts to help you untangle your anxiety, let go of that loser, and glow up for good.